Quotes in Real Estate

The age of scripts for sales is coming to an end. The dissemination of information has become too efficient for us to be persuaded in any direction by using any 'tactic' other than authenticity. And I am SO happy about that.

Regardless, we're all familiar with the scripts, affirmations, quotes, and everything else we say to ourselves and others to create a mood, portray an image... and maybe even convince. In the end, it's undeniable that delicate conversations that navigate emotions and provide people with the character that they are communicating with.

Having said that, I'm always careful not too come off as the stereotype 'Sharky', 'Salsey' Realtor everyone would expect.. If I said any of these following quotes, I might just give people that impression-

“I don't show houses, I sell houses.”

Yea, ok dude, you're better than me. I know.

“I'm no photographer but I can picture you in this house”

OMG, That's so sweet!

“If you sleep on it, you might not sleep in it”

That's one way to rush a buyer to a sleepless night.

“My crystal ball is in the shop”

Soothsayer hath spoken.

Now that I'm in the middle of writing this blog, I second-guess myself as I notice that I'm just smearing my opinion all over these quotes and all over the reader… But I'm in knee-deep and that's what blogs are for right!? ...

So let's move on to what I consider tactful approaches -


“There are no emergencies in Real Estate” - Tod Paxton

This can be proven as untrue but sets the right mood for a nervous buyer or seller.

“If an agent walks in and tells you what he(she) can sell your home for, he is either guessing or Lying, and both should disqualify that person as a professional” - Denny Grimes

A striking truth! The market is the final determinant of the price of a home. And the market is constantly changing. We, as agents of the market, are here to guide people using information and experience. Although I try to avoid using disclaimers about the impossibility of infallible predictions, I can get sued if I don't..

“Do I have your permission to be completely honest?”


“I can tell you what you want to hear or what you need to know”

I'm one who believes that you can always find a way to avoid saying “No” or flat-out disagreeing with someone, specially someone you're working with closely. But when you can't, these might be a nice disclaimer.

“It's always better to buy real estate and wait than wait and buy real estate” -Bill Lublin

The magic of inflation in one phrase.

“Buy the best, you'll only cry once.”


"Just because you poor Syrup on something doesn't make it pancakes"

“If the medicine you're taking isn't working, taking more of it or taking it for a longer period of time probably won't help”


"Your house smells like cat piss"

"90% of the people in the world hate wallpaper, the other 10% hate your wallpaper" – Janet Tidwell

"Nice shoes, wanna buy a house?" - Rob Wagner

This one almost steps into douchery but is pretty funny! ..I think..

“About your offer- Which half of the home is your buyer interested in buying?”

“If a low offer happens in a forest of full price offers, did the low offer ever happen?” - John Pohly

This almost goes without saying but-

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